A new wave of polar air is heading our way. Today was cold and rainy in the morning and I spent most of the day inside watching dumb TV and taking a nap. I made a pot of lentils, which were really yummy and will sustain me this week. Overall, my last weekend here was pretty dull. I had very little energy and really didn't want to do anything special, mostly because of the cold and my low energy in the wake of whatever illness I had for the past month.
Actually I did want to do a few things, but because of general laziness, I don't think I will. I wanted to see the Evita museum, but am not sure where it is or how to get there, and if I can't walk, I don't want to have to figure out how to get there. I also wanted to see Carlos Gardel's tomb, but really, what is the big deal? Again, it's kind of far and I'd have to take the subway and I'm feeling lazy. The other thing that I really wanted to do was to visit ESMA - the Escuela de Mechanica de la Armda - which I suppose in better times was a Military School, but it turned out to be one of the major detention and torture centers under the last dictatorship.
I know, it seems like a very strange thing to want to do. I refuse to watch movies where random violence occurs, though I did sit through two films about the last dictatorship and saw plenty of violence in the form of torture, rape and eventually murder. To me, there is a difference between violence for entertainment and violence as historical record. I know a lot of people would actually feel comfortable sitting through something like Gangs of New York (which was on today and I had to change the channel because of the violence) and Garage Olimpo, a movie about the abduction and torture of the disappeared under the dictatorship.
I've learned a lot about what happened during that time, even though in general, it's not an open topic of discussion. It's come up a few times in class, and between the two movies I saw, and some reading online, I think I have a clearer picture of what happened.
Basically, the military dictatorship took power after Peron's second wife, Isabelita, who became president after Peron died, made a total mess of the country. The country was already on rocky ground, but under Isabelita, it became worse. The military took power and began a campaign aimed at wiping out a guerrilla movement, and eliminating the communist threat. The triple A, a secret police force that Isabelita herself formed, also took part in the fun and games.
People were picked up for a variety of reasons - teachers, psychiatrists, Jews, students, activists, and others, were targets. According to Claudia, the arrests took place at night when nobody saw, but other sources suggest that there were also some done in plain sight. Women and children were also picked up. Children were either "adopted" by childless military families or sent to orphanages. Pregnant women were kept alive until they gave birth, and their children were given to military families - there are at least 500 known cases of women who were detained while pregnant, and the mothers of the disappeared and a new group, the abuelas (grandmothers) are sponsoring campaigns to recover these children, who are now adults.
Those who were detained were tortured and raped until they were no longer of use. If they died in custody, their bodies were dumped in the ocean or the River Plata from airplanes. If they were still alive, they were drugged, and their bodies were weighed down with concrete and then they were dumped in the river or ocean. All attempts were made to cover up what happened.
When democracy returned to the country, those responsible for the atrocities were pardoned. Only under the current president, Kirchner, has amnesty been reversed and some people are facing trial, though there are not many witnesses left to testify.
One witness is the son of a former prisoner who was released. His father told him what happened, and he identified a priest who was present during his torture. This priest is currently being tried. One of the most horrific things is that the Catholic Church participated in this campaign. This priest was present while people were being tortured, and in general, the church itself did nothing in protest as in other countries such as El Salvador, where members of the church actively opposed the disappearances and torture of civilians.
I've been thinking a lot about those times, which I remember very clearly - the 1980's, when people thought I was crazy for going to a country like Nicaragua. We had Pinochet in Chile, the dictatorship in Argentina, paramilitary forces in El Salvador and Guatemala, as well as dictatorships in Brazil, Paraguay and Uruguay. And that is only in Latin America. What an insane time it was, as the "communist threat" gave governments permission to round up, torture and murder their own citizens. And, US AID was behind so much of the training and equipment that was used to do the killing.
So, my desire to visit ESMA is more out of historical interest than some kind of sick obsession with death. I think it is important that I know, and am able to inform others, what happened here not too long ago, so that it might not happen again. In a world where denial seems to reign, it is so important that we discuss these difficult topics, and we don't let the memory of those whose lives were taken be lost.
But, I never made it. I am not sure if the plans to turn the school into a museum/memorial have been completed and it is open to visitors yet or not, and didn't want to take the risk of taking a taxi all the way out there to a part of the city I do not know to find that I can only see it through a gate, or maybe not see it at all. So, that trip is on hold until the next visit.
In other news, I had a tango lesson today and heard a lot of "mas pivot", but overall the lesson was good, and we really danced a lot. Marcelo threw in a lot of new moves and I was able to follow him well. He was hungover from drinking too much wine last night and he had that smell of someone who drank too much the day before. Still, the class was fun, frustrating at times, and I pretty much decided it was going to be my last class because I just can't take the intensity of it anymore. I also wore my new shoes for the first time and the suede soles really help with the turns. The shoes are a little dorky, but they work for dancing and everyone wears them so I won't be the only dork on the dancefloor. Eventually, I'll figure out an alternative.
I was trying to figure out how to tell Marcelo that it was my last class when he told me he couldn't see me in the morning this week, but was only free after 5. That gave me a perfect out. I told him I was busy because it was the last week of school. So we tentatively have plans to go to the Milonga on Wednesday and maybe have one more class next Saturday, but I don't think that is going to happen. Every time he has said he would get back to me, he hasn't. So, I think I'm done with tango until I get back to San Francisco, and I'm really looking forward to returning to my class there.
Other than that, the weekend was low-key. I took a few walks, did some shopping, but didn't buy anything, and didn't do any homework.
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